UPDATE FOR MAJOR STATUS CHANGE

Well, as can be easily noticed from the time lag between posts and the recent inactivity, not much has proceeded forward as hoped due to my seeming inability to make the "monetize" part of this whole idea work.



So screw it. :)



It's now a totally free blog in which no one is getting paid but instead of just doing away with it, we may as well use it, so for all those interested internet denizens who happen to be interested in this blog's material, welcome and please post!



I'd also like to take this opportunity to direct a preference (not a strict rule, just a preference) in people posting true stories they have experienced with face sitting and female dominance. If you have a true story regarding a giantess encounter then please post it, but be aware your credibility will likely flag somewhat....(however, if it really IS true, email me and I'll call you because you'll have my full attention!).



It is, in my opinion, an extremely unfortunate series of non-events during my childhood and adolescent years which resulted in not one encounter of female dominance, let alone face sitting. However, I have always been extremely sexual and the acuity of my sexuality during my early years was SO intense that it really deserves an entirely different word other than, "sexuality."



By the time I was five, I had an uncountable number of orgasms (all dry, of course...but powerful all the same. All of these orgasms and in fact, ALL of my sexual interest was centered only on one thing: macrophilia (lover of giant things). It reified very specifically with me by it centering on a lovely, full-bodied girl or woman who also happened to either be a giantess, or normal-sized and I was very small (between 1 to 3 inches tall). This lovely giantess was interested in only one thing: sitting-with her panties on or off-onto the pillow or bed on which my tiny form lay looking up at the descending doom. Then, squashed into immobility, I would feel a sublime sense of helplessness while she felt the polar opposite: an acute, sexual arousal due to her total domination of such a tiny man.



I realize as an adult, that this fantasy which WAS sex to me for YEARS has a few significant points. Because I was somehow taught that sex and sexual feelings were "naughty" I knew I should not participate in such things. However, my fantasy that I lived with then completely negated all possible fault and/or responsibility on my part. Because if you think about it, what is a two-inch 6 year old really going to do to counteract a lovely giantess bent on only one goal: to forcibly dominate you by sitting on you. Needless to say you are not going to push her off and in fact, the second significant denominator comes in here. When a two-inch boy or man is sat on by a curvy giantess who has a particularly large but beautifully shaped bottom it pretty much goes without saying that his entire body...his whole self....has been completely covered up and in a very thorough way. There is now only darkness, loss of all ability to move, to see or hear...with really the only sense being one of an overwhelming sense of submission and helplessness. The analogy here is the freedom of not only having no responsibility for this sexual experience, making me guilt-free but also I'm suddenly so overwhelmed and dominated that there is very little left of "me" or the self. Perception is reality.

So my reality has suddenly become one of no responsibility, a sense of helplessness and acute sexual arousal (for which I am blameless). This loss of self is accompanied by the feeling of being reborn when finally the lovely giantess has had her fun and she gets up, looks back and down and the very squashed and woozy but still alive tiny man. With a laugh and a promise of "Next time soon!" she is gone and he has had his orgasm which occurs at the height of his loss of self and sense of utter helplessness...further conditioning the psychological link of the orgasm representing both death and being reborn.

During an acute orgasm, a partial space of a second in time the human brain experiences a "neurological, electrical storm" of a sort which lights up hundreds of millions of brain cells and then just as quickly, turns them off again, resulting in a sort of natural "re-booting" of our own organic computer. In mythology and symbology around the world, the orgasm is often linked to death and life (quite literally, hundreds of thousands of sperm cells will become lost and then absorbed by the vaginal wall, all dying save for that special one that rarely, but sometimes, makes an egg into a zygote and truly begins the process of life).



So I can look back and rationalize why this sort of fantasy worked for me. As I grew a little older, I got acute kicks out of realizing that the giantess may want more from me than simply squashing a tiny male. She COULD want to....well, suck me IN. So there began a period of years that quite often still began with the giantess sitting routine, but then it grew into a truly macrophile fantasy of engulfment. I am tempted to say that it started with being sucked into the lovely giantess's vagina, but I am 99% sure it actually began with going into her bottom. It went this way for me because she was already positioned more advantageously for this "door" and it was naughtier and, being a young boy I was naturally not as familiar with all the details of the female vagina. Regardless, the feelings of helplessness and guilt-free sexual acuity were even more enhanced but now with an important addition: being consumed not as food but for sexual pleasure. Now the experience of death and rebirth is even more real and actually mirrors a rarely heard but very ancient word called, "unbirthing."



As women give birth (and thus life) so then they should possess the ability to unbirth (and take away life). This was a relatively common belief in the matriarchal world of an ancient history so old, that our race as homo sapiens was only beginning. But as anthropology teaches us, the very early people of our race were ruled by women. In fact, most societies had not linked the idea of sex with birth. So women were seen as higher beings who in turn, prayed to a female God - a Goddess - who would in turn bestow upon Her priestesses magical abilities the men greatly feared. One of these magical abilities was called, "Unbirthing." And, similar to my childhood night fantasies, it is theorized that to succeed in this magical act, the woman first reduced the luckless male in size by her sexual superiority, shrinking him to a size in which she could then put him into her vagina. As he disappears he continues to shrink so that when he is sucked deeper and deeper into her depths (while she builds up a true tempest of sexual energy and building pleasure) until he is pulled all the way to the "Os" - the opening to the uterus, her womb. At this point he is now even small enough to be sucked into the place in which it all began but for him, will be where it all ends.



Once she successfully sucks the now quite tiny male into her actual womb, the woman is both ready to finish the "Unbirthing" and to quite literally, crest her tidal wave of pleasure and experience an orgasm of such intensity that it is this itself, the power and level of intensity in which her dark lust explodes which triggers the necessary power of sexual magic needed to not only reduce the tiny male to nothingness, but to a nothingness superceding merely the physical. She has now not just killed him...she has reversed his entire process of life so that now he not only is not, he now never has been.



The curious thing about this admittedly far-fetched hypothesis is that very similar, if not identical beliefs and customs come from around the globe not only during the matriarchal era of power, but even afterwards where the female power cults and tribes kept their beliefs and the power of the Goddess alive. Some claim it is from this ancient belief system that the entire pagan/witchcraft religion is based on. Interested people should read world-famous, academically reknowned anthropologist, Dr. Paul Campbell, for references and readings on this subject matter.



The unbirthing concept not only makes me feel that I not perhaps all alone in the universe, even IF it's just an unproven (however interesting) factoid from ancient history and mythology and all my experience was simply an individually-spawned fantasy. But having said that, and in summary, past all the rationalizations and pyschological explanations for what sexuality WAS for me for years as a child and young adult, there still exists one enigma which I cannot explain or understand.



How does such a singularly potent, powerful, well-defined and specific fantasy/thought-sequence come to be in a 1-year old child? I can assure you I was not researching matriarchal anthropological mythology and belief systems then. And my memory goes WAY back and my sexuality is always right there with it. My first memory was when I was only weeks old and although admittedly the VERY early life memories are spotty, I DO remember feeling sexual well before the age of three and easily as young as one and two and that feeling, which I did not even as yet have a word for, meant ONLY the experience of being a tiny helpless being and sat on, engulfed and vanquished completely, obliterating my sense of Self from the sheer dominant power of the woman's Dark Lust.



If a man is unbirthed, for real, in the distant past, and finally is able to somehow generate a soul that can then be eventually born into a physical body once more...it would stand to reason that the unique and remarkable and quite memorable experience of being unbirthed in his last life could somehow linger within him, deep in his subconscious. Perhaps in the oldest vestiges of his original soul, his astral body that barely even survived the event...perhaps just enough to regenerate slowly over the ages until finally it could even attempt physical existence again...



I know, it's all very "out-there" and hypothetical, but like they say: when you have eliminated all logical possibilities then you MUST accept, no matter how unlikely, the one or two quite improbable choice left to you.



And as "out there" as it is, the unbirthing possibility is as close as I've ever gotten to understanding how A) such a young child - a baby even - was so acutely sexual in the first place; B) how the entire concept, feeling, experience....everything that is sex and sexuality....long before I knew what the word, "sexuality" or "sex" even was(!)....yet everything that it was became real and acute to me only by one very specific thing: the macrophile fantasy - a fantasy not merely an imaginative idea but a solid series of events that were accompanied by a very understandable, very realistic and acute feeling of experiencing what such a position of helplessness would feel like.

How the hell would a two-year old boy know so very well what an overwhelming feeling of submission you get from being a tiny, inch-high little man and then sexually dominated by a lust-driven woman who first sits on him and then sucks him into her body as a sexual snack, much like she would swallow a morsel of food for her hunger except this morsel appeases her lust and unlike the morsel of food which barely assuages her stomach's appetite, his tiny size equivocates the opposite: a huge, giant-sized sexual appetite and one that his tiny being can satisfy because it is exactly the great degree of their power difference which defines the entire action and relationship.



All of this I understood, KNEW and used in thousands of variations on exactly the same topic. Why? There is no doubt in my mind I was somehow born with this linked to that part of my mind and my intellect which dictates what is sexually interesting or exciting. What could possibly be the reason?



Perhaps it was not something so life-wrenching and impossibly believable as an actual "unbirthing." Maybe it was simply a normal man's life which became submissive. Combine that with him being of small stature, even a midget (still more likely than an unbirthing incident!) who was quite often sat upon...and by big women with matching derriere sizes. A big enough butt descending on a small enough midget would certainly appear to him that the moon was dropping on him and indeed, it's entirely within the realm of physical reality (not even that uncommon) that midget-sized men could be completely covered up if and when sat upon by a big enough woman...would being squashed beneath a heavy female's ass from head to toe generate enough stimuli and sexual acuity to survive into the next life....? And begin almost immediately!?



I don't know. And no, for those of you thinking I was somehow sexually abused as a very small child - even a baby - by a woman who sat on me I can only sigh and state I know I was not so lucky. I suppose I'm joking. If it really had happened to me I'm not at all sure I would think I was lucky. All I know is that for as long as I can remember I would have given anything I had to have a beautiful, full-grown woman secretly put me under her rump because I wanted it in the very worst way! Yet it seemed I was doomed to my perspective of sexuality being nothing I could even physically experience in the real world...a genuine tragedy to be sure!



It wasn't until I was in college that I discovered the Victorian Era books, written by Anonymous authors (because they were all or nearly all female authors). They featured the act of "Queening" frequently in their pages. For those of you still unaware of this word, it is:



The act of subjugating the male by settling the full weight and warmth of her bottom upon his upturned face, his nose sunk between her bottom cheeks and his mouth equally as smothered by her squashing pussy. While she takes her leisure upon him, he can do naught else but suffer beneath her pressing weight, her dark enclosure upon him and his lack of air (and complete inability to speak). Thus the woman is transported into a new realm in which she is the Queen and the "king" merely subject to her bottom's weight."



In modern terms it would be a combination of face-sitting, objectification, slave training and smothering. It was very accepted to queen a young male and while he squirmed and struggled uselessly beneath her, she would ignore him completely and work on her nails or adjust her coiffure. Ostensibly the act of queening was to condition young males to respect the female gender and to this end they encouraged and even facilitated the young man's sexual arousal during the queening act so that pyschologically, the male would forever after link arousal with submission to the female. It was also admitted that the act of queening provoked a "complimentary warmth" and so could prove exciting to the sitting female as well, but this was usually brought about by the mental stimulation - the realization of her empowerment over the male and the simplicity of merely having to SIT and by doing so, subjugating him to her will in bed and out.



Although the queening act has been shown to exist for as long people have been around really, it was Queen Charlotte who popularized it during the Victorian era when she sat on her husband, King Edward's face in front of their numerous children...and on multiple occasions! This immediately sent a message to the upper class women - a group very oppressed by the patriarchal system of the day - a message that was enthusiastically but privately activated by countless "Ladies" and "Countesses" and then, of course, the other classes followed in their course.



I had never heard of queening or face sitting but as soon as I began reading about this, I became very sexually aroused....nearly as aroused as I had become all those years before as a small child dreaming macrophilia fantasies. It still is a very real arousing idea and act for me because I guess it comes as close to the original (and physically unattainable) definition of "sex" I had as a child. It was quite a relief when I realized there was a real thing, a real act with a real name that could really be done that was nearly identical mentally to the macrophile concept and physically, very similar because once a man's face is sat on, there is only darkness and helplessness and loss of self even too...all the same things associated with my earliest ideas of sex....a tiny man being sat on and immobilized.



So facesitting/queening, while not considered a fetish, is perhaps an underlining "motivator" to my sexuality as an adult. I admit I still have macrophile thoughts and even dreams, but perhaps it's just as well that they stay in the realm of dreams and never become a reality...for who knows? You might just find yourself getting unbirthed and THEN you're really in trouble! :)



Please post your comments and your own experiences! I'm going to now publically link this blog out to several places so it should start rolling now. Thanks for your interest and help in making this as interesting as it could be educational!



PEACE.

- Tweaky